I am doll eyes, Doll mouth, Doll legs, I am doll arms, Big veins, Dog bait, Yea they really want you, They really want you, They really do, Yea they really want you, They really want you, But I do too, I want to be the girl with the most cake, I love him so much he just turns to hate 2004-04-23 7:03 p.m. qkurt and I talked about my disease yesterday. I had finally found out from my doctor more information. or at least she confirmed what I have. I told kurt and it was very emotional. He was very upset that this had to happen to such a good person. We are not sure if I can have children. That may not be the smartest option. For now I am trying to think positive and not worry about what lies in the future. Im at home now, off from work on disability. It is very hard to be at home with nothing to do, but at the same time I don't think I have the energy to go to work everyday. not yet. There are some positive things in my life, my symptoms have been suppressed with medication, I have a huge support system, and I may be going back to college in the near future. I really think I wanna focus on creative arts therapy. I wake up everyday unsure if my symptoms will come back, but i feel so healthy I don't see how they could. I don't find everyday stuff fun. I was at the metallica concert the other night, and at first I wanted to go right home and crawl into bed. i got into it after that. And when I went out with melinda to the crazy donkey, i had a horrible time. The things that used to be fun to me in life seems to be changed. I don't know. I think the one thing in my life that I miss the most is having that best friend that I hang out with everyday and have a blast with is missing. I used to have that. The only person that shares my history is far far away and has a life of her own. I wish she could move here. Im just looking for a companion. If it was someone who i could spend my days with that would be great! Im looking but it's hard.

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- - 2004-05-23
depression started the day you were born - 2004-05-17
me, myself and I. In a nutshell, cracked in half. - 2004-05-17
just a blabber - 2004-04-29
companion, crutch - 2004-04-23
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