I am doll eyes, Doll mouth, Doll legs, I am doll arms, Big veins, Dog bait, Yea they really want you, They really want you, They really do, Yea they really want you, They really want you, But I do too, I want to be the girl with the most cake, I love him so much he just turns to hate 2004-02-22 9:35 p.m. qtoday Im gonna talk about boys. men in my life. They have always been important to me. shit, what girl doesn't hold them high. But it's been very easy for me to get them to like me. well that implies that I try. which I don't really have to. And I like them very naturally too. There have been a few guys that I had to try to get. Like Larry, Brian, ummm.. well that's really it. I kissed a damn lot of guys before. I have made out with a few. Well, lets just say that I haven't been all that smart when it comes to them either. I have hurt well um.. every boyfriend I have been with. I have only had one person break up with me. I did the rest. I have kissed 4 different guys in the same day! I have kissed 3 different guys all at once. Anyways.. my point being.

It took me til september to see through all the bullshit talk and kissing up they do to realize they just want pussy. In the end that is all they want. They want to see you naked and have sex with you. They don't care about your mom or how you are doing in school. They tell me I'm hot, some have pinched or slapped my ass. Some tell you they love you just to get to third base with you.

Well, for a long while i bought into the whole gig. I really thought that it was fun to have lots of guys after me. (Im talking high school here people) I loved the thrill of chasing a guy that was hard to get. And in college. I found the best guy out there. A guy who, when I was drunk, and an easy target, literally, tucked me into bed and left instead of kissing me more and taking it further. I'm talking of course about Kurt. He is the dearest thing to me. I have never know true love before. I never knew a guy could be beyond the bullshit and really show true affection that was beyond just wanting to get laid. He was alway respectful towards me.

I tried really hard for him to like me, however, I didn't have to try at all. I pushed him away and pulled him back, pushed him away and then we started dating. I saved myself for him for about 2 years. Cause I knew he was the one. And I wanted our relationship to be built on friendship and trust, respect and true love. then the sex could come after. I knew he was the one for me. one reason was that he waited that long for me. This was a true man.

I guess there are things Ive done that I really regret. Through my whole life. But a level mind is what would have balanced me out. I always tried so hard to be sexy.

I thought that was my deal in life. being sexy. I had the blonde hair, the sexy outfits, the heels. Everything except the big fake plastic tits. But I have even flaunted the tits at times too. What girl hasn't. But now I've changed

For the first time I walk around bra less. I am no longer ashamed of my small breasts. I don't need to wear a bra when I am at home. So, I don't. its really just to make a statement to myself that I don't need padding to prove Im a woman. And all this time the looking sexy was just to keep kurt. Like I ever had to worry. Seriously. Put away the thongs already. Save it for special occasions. I'm being brutally honest here folks.

I have new respect for myself. I love myself for who I am, not the hottie i could potentiallly be. I mean sure, everyone likes to get looked at by people, be admired. But, maybe I will be looked out without having to try hard.

I tried no makeup for a while. that didnt work. I just like the way my face looks with makeup. I tried just having radiant skin. That was bland. We'll see what happens in the summer. I have a ton of short shorts and low cut tops. I actually wore them to work.

well , thats all i have to say.I hope my honesty hasnt made anyone think im wierd. But oh well, you shouldn't have been nosey.

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- - 2004-05-23
depression started the day you were born - 2004-05-17
me, myself and I. In a nutshell, cracked in half. - 2004-05-17
just a blabber - 2004-04-29
companion, crutch - 2004-04-23

My Diary new older about me leave me a note mail aim *guestbook* **Pics of Me** layout diaryland Courtney Love Can you deal? Characters Hey hey! .. =) So here it is: Erin: Me! Blonde hair, green eyes, 5'1. I live in Lindenhurst,NY-Long Island baby! I love to listen to music, party, hang out with my friends and my boyfriend. My favorite food is Pasta. I love summer and going to the beach for tanning of course. Random facts: -I have a cat named Izzy and one named Smokey I like to buy new shampoo and conditioner as often as possible -Kurt and I have been together for 5+years I won't let my daughter(when I have one) play with Barbies -As a child I lived on Spegghetios -I was born in Palm Beach Gardens,Fl. -I'm very creative -I wanna go back to school for Creative Arts Therapy -I love rain and thunderstorms I used to model when i was young and want to do it again -I hate my feet -I love the smell of fresh cut grass, and gasoline -when I was little I was afraid of knives -I'm obsessed with Courtney love -My friends call my "erbear",you're a special friend if you call me Er -I've always loved People say I am: a)creative b)intuitive c)I look like mena suvari =). Buh bye! .**Erin**. moon phases � My Mood**always SugarComa SNOOP these peeps barbie07 noelanii beautiful08 brittybaby perceptionss sugarbabylon carmen4ever free2dream glittercaz hotkisses69 teen-mother